Oh.. when you least expect it, a slap of wisdom hits you on the face to wake you up. I thought I was focusing on my children by proposing to move back to Florida and trusting my husband to hold down the Fort. After the “moving on..” post, I dropped off my children at school prior to my departure back to Phoenix. My oldest tells me, “Mom I can’t wait for summer”. Of course, I asked her why? “I can’t wait to be in Phoenix with you.” A couple of things happened that day.
One, I realized that my children are the happiest with me. Secondly, they are most complete with their new siblings and my husband. I fight in court for what only the court considers: Mother’s parenting time. However, I’ve come to realize that my girls are longing for much more. They love our combined family and feel complete in our house and environment. My decision as selfless as it appears, didn’t align with my children’s wishes or desires. I received surprising responses to my “moving on..” post.
The truth is, you’re right! A man’s desires are imminent. I was kidding myself to think the distance wouldn’t create a gap in our relationship. A day doesn’t pass without me falling asleep with my hand coupled in his. I can’t imagine weeks or months apart for either one of us. I know my children love me. I have to believe eventually they will decide where they want to live and with whom. I love them and i know they love me. I will support their choice.
I chose to stay with my husband in Arizona. As you know, the future is undetermined. Therefore, I will comply with my commitment to my children to visit them monthly in Florida and will continue to fight for their desires to have more time with me. Thank you for your support. I hope my words give you hope and help you sleep at night. You are not alone.